COPING WITH CHANGE LIFE'S TRANSITION STAGES - THE PERIPAUSE AND MENOPAUSE
How do we do "coping with change?". I don't mean change such as a new hair cut or a new lipstick or a new kitchen. I mean real change thats rocks our core ... our identity. As we go through life there is no doubt we have many relationships with self during life transitions. They all bring various struggles and strains. For many women approaching or going through the menopause is a transition stage in life that they have not prepared for. Emotionally or physically. It's sort of just crept up on them. Some suffer for years without realising they have been suffering symptoms. After all what are the symptoms? It seems with all the literature out there - there is "no one size fits all". From becoming forgetful, hot flushes, sleepless nights, weight gain, dry itchy skin, hair falling out, emotionally triggered - its different for each of us.
THE SYMPTOMS? WHAT'S THE REMEDY?
These are very individual to each woman. What I can say for some it can be a confusing, frustrating time where many women don't have the time or luxury to acknowledge what is happening to them. Many suffer for years thinking "they are losing the plot" or quote "losing their mind". Coping with change can feel overwhelming, impossible to deal with and relationships often suffer. A common coping with change coping strategy with many couples and families is to push it under the carpet until it is or nearly too late. When coping with change makes you life implode.
For some accepting they are ageing and their looks are ageing also can be part of the battle. Loss of identity can lead issues around self-worth and confidence. This stage in life can propel some to becoming obsessed with trying to look younger. A healthy obsession can be good - sometimes for some it can get out of hand. Botox, Fillers, cosmetic surgery, personally I don't think there is any harm if balanced. As I believe it comes down to an individual's right to personal choice. But if it gets out of control that's when problems start. Talking to a qualified counsellor can help you bring some focus whilst you speak to someone in a caring, supportive and empathetic environment.
WHAT AND HOW CAN THERAPY HELP WITH?
Some clients just want someone to understand what they are going through, to have their feeling validated. For some having reached this point in their lives they feel they want to make dramatic changes and want support. A safe space to vent their frustrations or talk their ideas out.
For some clients the hard reality they can no longer have more babies hits them hard. Accepting this change in their bodies has a significant emotional impact on their lives and their close relationships. For others the menopause brings with it a breakdown in their personal relationship.
There are others that the menopause has come early - dealing with it in their 20's or 30's. this can be a tough time dealing with the emotional impact of such reality. With more coverage in mainstream media it is now not uncommon for women to use therapy to become aware of this life transition stage from as early their twenties and to prepare their lifestyle accordingly.
For some accepting and coping with the physical and emotional changes ageing can bring can result in them partaking in risky behaviour such as sex kinks or substance abuse or emotional/ binge eating.It can lead to loss of control and angry outbursts. or bring about a whole host of issues individual to the client.
Speaking to a qualified counsellor can help improve your life quality.